How To Build a Village That Supports Your Business and Your Life with Carly Church

Kathi: Hi. As promised, I'm here with Carly, and I want to introduce Carly to everyone here. Welcome to the show, Carly. I'm so glad you're here.

Carly: Yay. Thank you.

Kathi: So let's talk about We Got You Mama. Let's talk about the transition. I know that you went through a series of burnouts as a franchisee. So tell me your backstory a little bit. Let people get to know who you are.

Carly: Awesome. Hello, everyone. I'm Carly Church. I founded We Got You Mama about a year and a half ago, and it's all about building the village. We weren't handed the village. We have to learn how to build it ourselves, and we have to work a lot harder than we want to, I think, nowadays to do that. I have three kids. They are now 15, 12 and nine, so they keep me on my toes. And I have learned that systems and operations, in business and in home, are all so necessary. They are my saving grace.

Carly: When I owned a fitness franchise that supported moms mostly in the early postpartum stage, I hit a massive level of burnout. I was trying to do everything myself. I was not giving my team, I think, enough responsibility. I had trust issues. And for a long time I was also teaching a lot of classes. I was physically teaching group fitness classes and running the business and running the team. Towards the end, before I decided to sell, it was at a point of, I'm completely done. I'm sick. I am tired. We had just experienced the largest urban fire in human history out here in Los Angeles, and part of that was in my territory. So I went to making sure my moms and families had homes and their babies were taken care of and they had water. That is, I think, what sent me spiraling. My ADHD is my superpower. I'm good in the moment and I'm good in the chaos. And then I hit rock bottom after the chaos settles a little bit, if that makes sense.

Carly: So this second time around, starting a new business, I've been super aware of all the things I did right and did wrong in my last business, to make sure that I stay clear enough and organized enough so that doesn't happen again. Because we have to be there for our kids. We have to be there for our families. But more importantly, we have to be there for ourselves, or we can't be there for anyone on the level that we want to.

We have to be there for ourselves, or we can't be there for anyone on the level that we want to.

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Kathi: Right. So when the fires hit, that affected your business as well, because it was local. So then you had all the stress of running the business and trying to keep it afloat. And then you closed it and then you launched?

Carly: I sold it. Yeah, I sold it. It was quite a large territory. I split it into a couple, and I sold it to someone younger and more vibrant, and helped them get started. They already knew the drill and had been part of the village for a long time. One of them also owned another territory, so that was a huge blessing, that she could jump in, know the drills, take the handoff and not have to go through another six months of onboarding someone else. Because I really wanted to make sure our member moms were being taken care of, and she's done a phenomenal job at that.

Carly: But I'm someone who doesn't know how to stop completely. So during all this, I thought I could do both. I thought I could launch We Got You Mama and pair it with my FIT4MOM business. There was a lot of crossover in partnerships, in business and in relationships I wanted to access. But at the corporate level, it was, I don't think you should do that. And I was like, I don't like to be told what to do. When it's all for good, you know what I mean? We're all on the same page. We need everyone doing what we're doing and supporting more moms. So it feels really good to be able to start something from scratch and build it on my terms. There's no one hovering over saying what you can and can't do, and that's been really special. So I've been able to write my book this past year. It just hit bestseller last week on Amazon.

Kathi: Congratulations. We'll put the link so you guys can download it in the show notes for sure. Well, I understand why you thought that it would be the perfect marriage. It makes sense.

Carly: Yeah.

Kathi: Because you're serving moms and you just want to serve moms more. Things happen in business, and in retrospect it always seems like a blessing. Now you're done with that, moving on to the next chapter, and now you can completely focus, and hyperfocus, as we have the propensity to do as entrepreneurs, on what you're doing. So what's the concept behind We Got You Mama? Let's talk about that.

Carly: I have found in the last 16 years of motherhood that there's a lot missing. I call it the village gap: in the health care system, in educating women, in how we're supported in the home, the mental load. I go through all the things in my book. But I found that I was really good at, and I really love, connecting moms to resources to lighten their load, to bring them out of postpartum depression, to help them feel more organized, or to connect them to the right school for their kid, or the right therapist, or the lactation expert. I started collecting what I call my people library. And I thought, this needs to happen more on a global scale. Not everyone feels like they're in the position to run out to a mommy and me class and ask questions or get information.

Carly: So I wanted to build a platform that supports moms not only in the early postpartum stage but every single stage, because it all comes with a lot of questions. I get to build that, and I'm starting with the early postpartum stage. The book is the first one of many. That's where it all begins, in that early postpartum stage, and really focusing in on the mom. We focus so much on the baby and on the kids and not on the one that is rearing them, and how important it is for her to be emotionally regulated. For that to happen, she has to be properly supported, and systems aren't built to properly support a mom, not to the capacity that is needed. So I talk a lot about that in my book, and I give moms the language and the tools and the resources to really put themselves first, and the shift they will find happens when they do.

Carly: It's a beautiful and amazing job, but it is the hardest job, I believe, in the world. And if you're trying to do the hardest job in the world, you can't do it alone. You just can't. So when it comes to motherhood, when it comes to the momtrepreneurs that I support in my village, it's not fun to do alone. We get to do it together, and we get to learn how to ask for help. This whole, oh, I'm fine, I got this, I'm fine, I can do it, I'm fine. It's not serving anyone, especially not you.

If you're trying to do the hardest job in the world, you can't do it alone. You just can't.

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Kathi: And that's the default. It's like, I got this, because I'm a mom. I know what I'm doing. I think what you're doing is such beautiful work and so very needed. Congratulations. I didn't mean to skip right over your bestseller.

Carly: Yeah.

Kathi: So what is the title of your book?

Carly: It's called We Got You, Mama: The No-Nonsense, Expert-Packed Guide to Going from Surviving to Thriving. Because I feel like we are in survival mode a lot of the time, but it doesn't have to be that way. We can definitely switch modes into thriving. There are going to be moments of chaos and desperation, and this is part of life, but it doesn't have to be like that all the time. I really think we deserve to thrive.

Kathi: Okay. Well, my ears perked up when you were talking systems. So let's talk about your favorite organizational system that you use for launching and running this business now.

Carly: Yeah. I have learned that if you can get as many things on one platform as possible, do that. Because with AI, they'll always be throwing new things at you. Let's find three AI tools that work the best and implement those. Will there always be new stuff coming in? Yes. But do the ones that you're using work? Yes? Great. Just keep using those and perfecting your skills in those. I think it's so easy to get distracted, especially with all the new things being produced. So everything in one place.

Carly: I use GoHighLevel. I use it as my membership base. I use it to connect all my social media platforms. You connect your calendar in there, your emails in there, your launch campaigns, your newsletters. And having a hub for everything instead of 10 things, and only paying for one thing instead of 10 things, it's smarter. It's a little bit smarter. And then as you grow your team, you get to train them in that, and everything's there. If they need to learn how to use it, there are training videos, and they learn how to use the things and can really take off. I have an intern that's doing that right now, and it's wonderful. It's really great. So find a great hub.

Having a hub for everything instead of 10 things, and only paying for one thing instead of 10 things, it's smarter.

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Carly: I've also found that a lot of moms are getting distracted and don't love social media so much anymore: the Facebook groups that people are using to build community and build out their groups, using Meta and all that. I found that can be too distracting. You go down too many rabbit holes when you tap into any social media platform. So having your own membership community, where it's just your stuff, they go there and they're only going to come across your stuff and your files and the things that you post. I think that makes it more special. It's more intimate, and they're not going to be distracted by other people's stories and things popping up. They can really focus in on what they're there for.

Kathi: So having a membership. And is your membership on Facebook? Is that the platform you chose?

Carly: No, I built mine on GoHighLevel, so that you could avoid all the distractions that social media brings. And some of my people aren't even on Facebook anymore. Some people aren't on Facebook anymore, and I've come across that a lot lately. So this allows our own private community, where they get to log in just like they would on any other platform, but it's a safe, closed space, which feels really good too.

Kathi: Yeah, I'm with you on that. Having one is organizing 101, like with life. Let's have everything all in one place. And I think HighLevel has definitely accomplished that, thank goodness. I've bounced back and forth between so many programs and changed platforms so many times, and I'm very happy to have landed here, like you have, with HighLevel, because it is a one-stop shop and does pretty good work, and good training as well for your support.

Carly: Oh my gosh, they will stay on the phone with you for an hour to sort out any questions you have. Some entrepreneurs don't have the budget to pay for someone to do all this setup. They will team up with you, and you can get someone on the phone who's an expert at GoHighLevel. You wait maybe three minutes to get in a room with someone, and then they'll answer and go through it and screen share. So it doesn't have to be overwhelming. They will take it step by step. And I think that's really cool too, because sometimes tech can be very overwhelming, but it doesn't have to be. There's help.

Carly: Yeah. It's not like some other platforms that are very confusing, like all the white labels. Don't be confused by all the white labels, because those can easily go out of business and you lose all your stuff. I've gotten to the point where it's no more white labels. I don't care what you're offering anymore. I've had two crap out on me. Own your own stuff. Have your own stuff, and don't start linking it to other things anymore. That's, in my experience, what I've learned.

Kathi: Yeah, I'm with you on that. So when it comes to managing your day and managing your time with your family, keeping busy, because three kids is a lot, how do you block your time? How do you work your schedule? What does your life look like on a daily basis?

Carly: I am huge on calendaring. My husband and I, and sometimes my two oldest kids, will meet on a weekly basis, like a little business, and we'll calendar plan. I talk to a lot of parents who are all over the place, and the husband doesn't know what's going on. And then they're like, your husband planned the summer camps? I'm like, why not? It shouldn't all fall on the mom to do all the planning and to know the schedule. To hold a family schedule of multiple humans and a dog, that's not okay. We don't need to hold all that.

It shouldn't all fall on the mom to do all the planning and to know the schedule.

Carly: I have taught my kids from a super young age to refer to the digital calendar. I got it for Mother's Day six or seven years ago, and they have learned to not ask me. You check the calendar. We put everything in there. Don't ask me to hold anything up here. I've got enough going on.

Kathi: Love it. Love it. Love it.

Carly: And they check it. My nine-year-old, ever since she was six, goes to the calendar. She sees when dance class is. Do I need to pack my bag before school? Do I need to put it in the car, because I know I'm going from school to dance? It's not our job. It's not our job to know all those things for them. And you're doing a disservice if you do all those things for them, because they're going to be these adults going out into the world who don't know the difference between a washing machine and a dryer. And that's a real story. My husband works at a high school, and he's heard college students come back and tell stories. And I was like, what were these parents thinking?

Kathi: Yeah. Right.

Carly: But my kids are getting on stools and doing dishes and laundry at a very young age, because they need to learn responsibility. And then if something gets forgotten, they can't blame it on me. They can't blame it on their dad. Of course we help them out with reminders. But I send them to the calendar, and they keep their own planners. They've learned how to time block. These are things I didn't have when I was younger. I didn't learn how to time block. I didn't have a planner. And they do now. We get to introduce those skills to our kids, and it'll benefit us. It's hard to teach them in the beginning, but it offloads a lot down the line.

Kathi: Well, and they learn really quick. They learn much quicker than we do. So if you start them young, I'm in total agreement with that. My youngest client that I've ever had was five years old, and she learned very quickly, and her seven-year-old brother helped her learn even more. Kids are like sponges. So good for you. You said you were gifted a calendar. What calendar do you use?

Carly: There are two main brands out there, and it'll come to me.

Kathi: So it's not Google? You're not using a shared Google calendar?

Carly: It's a Google calendar that you share with the digital calendar app, if that makes sense. So it projects it onto the screen. It'll come to me further in our conversation. I started to think I should do a partnership with them, because I am talking about it all the time. Before then it was color-coding calendars, and it was a lot. This is just brilliant, because they can click on their name, and you can put tasks in there and chores. But if anything, it's just that space they can go to that holds all the things. So yeah, the name will come to me.

Kathi: I think it's funny that you were gifted the calendar from your husband.

Carly: I know. I was like, oh, thank you so much. Like a vacuum. Oh, thank you. This is for all of you guys to use. Okay, cool.

Kathi: Yeah. That's a big gift, actually, when they all use it. The family meeting thing I think is critical. I do that a lot with families that I work with and coach. You've got to have a weekly meeting at least, so people know who's going where, what and how. Now, with the digital age and digital calendars, it's so much easier than the old wall calendar. So if you had to look back and give your 18-year-old self some advice, what would you tell little Carly?

Carly: Oh man. I would tell her, don't sweat all the small stuff. Your teenage years are such a short period of your life. It's a blip. And it'll all work out, because it usually does. Even when we hit chaos now and the world feels like it's going to crap, you can still hold on to the belief and have faith that it will all work out. And focus on the bigger picture. We get so lost in our little daily lives, our day-to-day, and what our business is doing, and is my kid making the right decision, this and that. If we step back and look at the bigger picture, it really helps me keep what I call an eternal perspective on what really matters. Are my kids healthy? Are they clothed? They seem pretty happy most of the time. Moody, yes, that's normal. Great. Okay, we're normal teenagers.

If we step back and look at the bigger picture, it really helps me keep what I call an eternal perspective on what really matters.

Carly: It was actually pretty fascinating. I got to go to a private interview and speaking event with Trevor Noah this morning, and I didn't know how humble the guy was. He comes from very humble beginnings in South Africa, of course. He spoke about how, if you are able to get yourself in your own car to the grocery store and get a couple pints of ice cream and some cornflakes, you're doing really well. And behind that, he shared, and maybe I'm not supposed to share this, because no one could even bring their phones into this event, but I'm sharing it today on the show. When he grew up, you never got ice cream, and cornflakes were unheard of. If they ever did have cornflakes in the pantry, it was, oh, it's a good month here if we see cornflakes. So now, he said, I go to the grocery store and buy a couple pints of ice cream because I can, and I buy cornflakes. He said, I don't even eat cornflakes, but it's a reminder for me to keep in my pantry, so that when I open it up and see cornflakes, life is good. And I was like, oh my gosh. So it's all perspective.

Kathi: It is. It is. And yeah, he did come from humble beginnings. Congratulations on getting interviewed by Trevor. I think he's an amazing person.

Carly: Oh, I didn't get interviewed by him. I was at an event where I just got to see it, and I got a picture with him later and got to say what's up. But it was cool to just hear him speak and share stories and share wisdom. I should have brought a notepad, because there were so many nuggets that just spilled off of him. He's a very intelligent, clever and hilarious human being. And I've been getting into standup more lately and studying more comedians like him. I really love the empowering, intelligent comedians who are great storytellers, and he's definitely one of them.

Kathi: So you've been getting into standup yourself? Ah, that's cool.

Carly: It's been a lot of fun. My demographic is mothers, so a lot of my stories are surrounding that, and there is just so much content to work with.

Kathi: It's going to be great for book number two and number three.

Carly: Yeah, for sure. I write in a way that is, yes, empowering and educational, but it's also hilarious. You have to bring some fun and some hilarity into life, or what's the point? It can suck, but it can also be really funny.

Kathi: Exactly. Well, it's a game, and depending on your beliefs, it's all an illusion anyhow. So we're just here to play and have some fun. Might as well have some fun and bring some levity into it. I know that you have something that you would offer the audience. So what is it that they can download or hear or take in?

Carly: Yeah. I recently designed an AI organizational workflow for the household, and I'll offer that to your audience. It'll link to a Google Doc, and it's awesome. It's the prompts you can use for anything from calendar planning to how you want to plan your summer. It all can be very overwhelming, but again, it doesn't have to be. You can let ChatGPT think for you, and I think your mind will be blown a little bit when you offload some of that brain power to ChatGPT. So there are some workflows in there, all the way down to the kitchen. You can take a picture of what's in your fridge and say, this is all I have, what can I make for dinner? And it spits out recipes. Some of them gross. Some of them have been really good. So it's, what's for dinner? I don't know. Ask ChatGPT. We can actually do that now, which is amazing. It's a blessing. We can use what's out there now in AI for our benefit.

Carly: I know some people are scared, or some people are like, oh, it's non-human. But hey, if I can offload a house manager's job that would charge me 50 bucks an hour to AI, I'm going to do that, and I'm going to teach my kids to do that. Not for schoolwork. But if I could say, hey, take a picture, what's in the fridge, nine-year-old daughter? Tell me what we should eat for dinner. And then she helps prepare it. Those are cool life skills. They're going to be working with AI anyway, so you might as well integrate it into the home and help lessen the load.

They're going to be working with AI anyway, so you might as well integrate it into the home and help lessen the load.

Kathi: What a nice little download. Make sure to hit the link and download that, you guys. Even if you don't have kids, I think it's going to help you at least come up with some dinners, bare minimum. That's brilliant. I absolutely love that. Well, Carly, is there anything that I should have asked you that you wanted to cover? Am I missing anything here?

Carly: I don't think so. I'm currently building a membership base. It's super low cost. It's seven bucks a month right now for founding members before it goes up. I'm building a space to ask questions of experts that I bring on, and it's going to be everything that my audience wants to know. So if they're like, hey, I would love to know more about sleep, I want to know more about this AI world, I want to know more about the pelvic floor, whatever it is, we're going to bring in experts. What I have realized is, the more summits I go to, the more events I go to, the more educational events I go to, people swarm the stage, because they just have so many questions after those speakers get down. So instead of speaking at people, we're going to come in and get your questions answered. I think that's really important. Yes, they're going to share information, but also, read this chapter in the book and then follow up with this blog post, or if you have additional questions. And I think that's what's cool about our community and my book: it all links together. If you want to learn more, go here. If you want more connection, go here. Which I think is really important too.

Carly: I'm building a mom bot, which is fun. I had to take her down because she was getting a little too aggressive. She was like, if you need help, call this number. And I was like, no, I'm not taking phone calls for people who need urgent help. So I have to restructure some things. But basically, all I hear all the time is, I'm googling information at 3 a.m. about my baby, or about whatever I'm worried about. You're googling it away. So I'm building a really comprehensive, intelligent mom bot that you can ask stuff, because she's fed legit information that has been vetted.

Kathi: Right. That's not the case with the internet. You're not going to discover vetted, solid, trustworthy information.

Carly: So that's going to be launching soon too, my fun little mom bot. I don't have a name for her yet, so maybe I need to start getting some votes in for names for my mom bot. I love Barb, but I don't know. We'll see.

Kathi: Well, I think it has to have mama in there somewhere. Mama bot. Something mama.

Carly: Mama bot. Mama domain. Oh, gone.

Kathi: But maybe Mabot. Grab that one.

Carly: I'm going to write that down.

Kathi: Yeah. Mabot.com. Or even mabot.info.

Carly: Yeah. AI is out there too, like .ai. Those are being picked up a lot lately too, which is interesting.

Kathi: It's very interesting. Well, thank you for your time. I am thrilled with what you're doing. It does take a village, and you're here to support that village and to create the village. So everybody, download the AI tools and look out for that mama bot of some sort. Carly Mama, Mama Carly, I don't know, something. We'll figure it out.

Carly: Yeah. And snag the book. It's on Amazon or on my site, if you want to snag the book. The digital and the print copies are out now too, so it's pretty cool.

Kathi: Absolutely. Go ahead and download the book. Grab it, and download the app. And thank you, Carly. It's been a pleasure. I wish you much success with your membership. Have fun.

Carly: Okay, take care. Bye-bye, everybody.

Kathi: Until next week. We'll see you then.