How to Find Your Soul Purpose with Lisa Haisha

Kathi: Hi, everyone. I'm back. I am with Lisa Haisha. We're going to talk about SoulBlazing. We're going to talk about entrepreneurship. We're going to talk about travel and fun and in-depth exploration of ourselves as entrepreneurs. So welcome, Lisa. I'm so glad you're here.

Lisa: Hi. So great to be here.

Kathi: Well, let's talk a little bit about your SoulBlazing and how you became a soulblazer. So let's do the backstory of your life. What did your parents do, and how did you grow up?

Lisa: Well, a long story very, very short, because that's one of my main talks. Here's my book, SoulBlazing. And this came about, I think, because I grew up in San Diego under a Baghdad roof. So we were limited in what we could do. We were much more restricted than other kids. So it really helped develop my curiosity of what's over there. They wanted us to marry somebody: this is who we want you to marry. We went to a lot of funerals and baptisms and baby showers, that kind of stuff. A lot of it was family oriented, and we were supposed to be home after school. No sleepovers. And so we didn't really grow that much and have some of the same experiences as other children our age. So I think I just had this voracious curiosity. And at one point, when I was around 10, my maternal grandmother came over and said she had gone to a psychic, and she said that my mother was going to marry a foreigner, when she married a guy from Baghdad and she's from Virginia, and that she would have five kids, five girls, and one of them would be famous. And I get to be the famous one. My other sisters didn't care. For some reason, with my personality, it represented freedom and money and travel and all that, because that's when all these great stars were out there, Liz Taylor and Marilyn Monroe. I don't know. I want that life. So I started researching what that is and figured it out. So I go, okay, I've got to move to Los Angeles when I'm older. I've got to get out of this marriage thing, and I've got to figure it out. So I think that was a seed that was planted, which is so fascinating, which is really how possibly SoulBlazing started, because your thoughts create your reality. That's a big underlying value I offer with clients, and it's a whole process I put them through.

Your thoughts create your reality.

Share this quote on X

Lisa: And then, one of the things at funerals: they had these women. They actually hand out tissue boxes to everybody in the immediate family, and before the funeral they start saying harsh things to them, like, why are you crying? You were never even there for them. They needed money. You didn't give it to them. They're saying this in Arabic, and what I recall was a very firm way. And I'm like, oh my God, this is so mean. And then you see people going down the aisle, the women hitting themselves, pulling hair out at the grave. So I thought, wow, who are these people? Later, when I was older and I could ask about it, I realized they were brought there to help people get rid of grief, so they don't have to live with it. Just get rid of it then, because then they give you 40 days, 40 nights, the Middle Eastern way, to get rid of it. You have to wear all black, and then you get to live your life again. So I thought about that. So when I was creating SoulBlazing, I moved to LA. I did the acting thing. And I hated the business side. I couldn't do it, especially being of Middle Eastern roots. It was too much compromise and this and that. So I decided to quit. But I thought, what am I going to do? My whole life, this is what I was going to do. So I went through my period of who am I, what am I. I lost my passion to live. It's like, if this is life, I can't just go get that job. I'm just not built that way. And I started seeing Christiane Amanpour on TV, and I thought, oh, I like her job. She's a war reporter. She's in Bosnia. She's in Afghanistan. That's like acting, but in real life, because there's all this action all the time. And I thought maybe I could do that. Then I see Saddam on the screen, and it was Desert Storm, and I'm like, I could go to Iraq to find my roots. And then I see that they were talking about it being a no-fly zone. Their airport was shut down. There was a bus ride from Jordan to Iraq that was very dangerous, that got stopped five times, and sometimes they kidnapped foreigners, especially Westerners. So I thought, oh, I could go there, get kidnapped, then write a book with these people and be on CNN and all that. How to transform from terrorist to humanitarian. Crazy.

Kathi: You're a crazy woman.

Lisa: Yeah. And then I could get on CNN and become a war reporter, because I thought I had an affinity for outlaws, because I hitchhiked when I was younger. When I got mad at my parents, I got in cars with dangerous people, because I'm like, who are they trying to protect me from? Why can't I go do this and that? I did that about a half a dozen times. And so they were my first therapists, really. Why do you drive this car? Why are you broke? Who are you? Why do you have piercings? Why this, why that? And I went, wow, these are all really nice people who just made a choice. There's not one cookie-cutter way to live. And then I worked in prisons. I went and got my master's in psychology, and for your 3,000 hours, you have to do work. So I worked in women's prisons, and everyone there was, I'm guilty. Men's prisons: I didn't do it, it wasn't my fault. Which is really interesting.

Kathi: The women were guilty and the men were not.

Lisa: Yeah. The women were like, I killed him, he deserved it, this is what he did to me. And the men were like, I was framed, I'm not guilty. So working with them, I saw these different patterns and started asking, how did they end up here? What is their psychology? How can I help them? Because one of them, I got the bully of the prison. She was six feet tall, shaved head, a snake coil tattoo on her head that went down her, big biceps. And I'm like, okay. And she bullied everybody. And she's like, I'm just here because I have to be, because you get points, you get a privilege or something. But I've been in here for 23 years. And she said, no one's been able to fix me, because I'm not fixable. This is my life. I can never get out. I'm a lifer. Everyone is a lifer, but it looks like a whole city. It looks like San Diego. They have everything there. I go, but what's wrong with that? Then stay here. And she's like, I hate your stupid briefcase. I'm like, well, I hate it too. I brought it in here to impress you. That kind of broke the ice, and we're talking. And once we broke the ice, I held her hands and started talking to her soul to soul, like, I'm not going to judge you, let's just talk. And somehow that broke her, and she started crying, saying, Lisa, you just blazed my soul. Like, oh, you just gave me the name of my business. I'll call myself a soulblazer.

Kathi: I love it.

Lisa: Yeah. So I think all these things led up to Iraq, going, oh, I know these people. Then I worked with foster kids a lot, all these troubled kids, and I could work with them. I'm like, oh, they get me and I get them. This was before ISIS had names. They weren't brands at that time, and al-Qaeda wasn't a brand. It was just, oh, bad people. So I went on that bus ride, went to Iraq, and I thought I could find my roots and understand my culture, because I thought that was holding me back so much. Going there, I tried to get kidnapped. I brought a fake Louis Vuitton bag and fake cubic zirconia: oh, my diamonds from my relatives. Like, pick me, pick me. Nobody hurt me. Everyone's habibi: how can I help you? Be safe. I'm like, where are all the terrorists? Where are all the mean people? I went to big rallies there: we hate America, America is Satan, death to America. Then I'd go, I'm American. They'd go, oh, habibi, you eat for free. I'm like, I'm American. Oh no, we have to do that. If we don't, we get thrown in jail or there's a punishment. I'm like, oh my God. They said, we're just like you. We're just the people. We have to listen to our government. I'm like, oh my God. So it made me learn a lot about the world. And then I went to the orphanage there, and I started interviewing the kids there, and that was so profound. That took me on a five-year journey to 15 countries interviewing children, and that was my first book. That experience just made me love travel and go, oh, there's so much more in the world. So I have a master's in psychology now, I'm street smart, and I wanted to go. Then I did a year of going: I went and stayed with the Dalai Lama for four days, went to the mountains of Petra and stayed with the Bedouins, stayed with the Sufis in Cappadocia, the shamans in Peru, the Maori in New Zealand, the Maasai tribe in Tanzania, the Aborigines in Australia, spending a month or so with each to learn the spiritual side. I grew up with traditional Middle Eastern, so every place taught me something. And then I felt like I had so much information. I'm like, let me write a book, SoulBlazing, because I started doing these different exercises with clients.

Lisa: And it all started with your soul. When your soul gets in alignment with your personality, that's when your life starts working. When you're fighting against your soul's purpose, your life keeps going off, and you're like, what's wrong? I'm doing everything right. But your soul comes in here. Your soul's a visionary, and it comes here for a mission. And you have to have your personality to create obstacles, because otherwise it would be boring if you go, oh, I want to be an actor. Oh, I'm the number one star in the world, and there are no obstacles, and now everyone loves me, and I'm super rich, and I get to do whatever I want. The perfect relationship, perfect kids. So you have to have obstacles to grow. Look how bright the stars are. You have to have the dark vastness behind them to see the stars light up and shine bright. And that's who we are. So we can't go, God, I wish that wouldn't happen to me, I wish I didn't have that obstacle. Because that's what makes you shine. You can't shine without that.

When your soul gets in alignment with your personality, that's when your life starts working.

Share this quote on X

Kathi: Yeah, I see that. And it sounds like you stayed with the kiddos for quite a long time, because you can see their souls and they can see your souls much easier, I think, right?

Lisa: Yes. Absolutely.

Kathi: With the children, that's an easy transition. More power to you with working with the prisoners. And so what happened with the lady?

Lisa: The one that I worked with, she ended up going to a pay phone, raising $25,000 or something for battered women, and became the person, like the angel: oh, you're here, let me show you the ropes, and all of that. And she said she couldn't be changed. So they're like, what did you do to her? And I'm like, I soulblazed her. Ask her.

Kathi: From the bully to the angel. That's phenomenal.

Lisa: Yeah. And that's when I thought, oh, I have a gift. I could tap into people the way other people can't. And I'm going, is that because of my early years? I didn't really understand how I was being raised. And then hitchhiking, and at a young age learning about these other people and seeing how well they treated me when I needed someone to listen. You couldn't share everything; keep your skeletons in your closet. And I just said everything: oh, this is what I'm going through. And they listened and gave advice. I'm like, wait a minute. So I think I feel a connection with wounded people that are maybe destroying their life or not living life the way they could, because they don't know how to get out of the maze. So I'm not threatened by them. I know how to embrace them, and I think they feel that. Again, I've traveled so much alone. Even in Amsterdam, in the red light district at 4:00 a.m., my friends are saying, let's all walk home together. I go, no, I want to walk by myself. And then I find a drunk guy who's 6'4". Will you walk me home? He's like, how do you know I won't hurt you? I'm like, oh, I don't attract that. I don't know who you are, but with me, you'll be an angel, because that's all I attract. Let's talk. Why are you this way? Why are you on the street? So there's always a connection. I wasn't afraid to go anywhere or do anything.

Kathi: Yeah, that's fantastic. And because you know that, you're on soul purpose. I think anytime you're on soul purpose, the obstacles go away. I see that a lot throughout everybody's life that I witness, and myself as well, if you're on purpose and you're doing what you're supposed to be doing. But it takes a long time, I think, for people to figure out what their soul purpose is. Do you have any advice around that for people who are like, I'm doing this thing? I mean, number one, first off, I think that people who are entrepreneurial and have started their business are going down their purpose road. That's why they did it. They have enough desire to go there. But for people who feel like they're missing the boat, what would your advice be to them, Lisa? People who are doing stuff that they don't enjoy just for money, or they started this business and they know they're tipping towards where they should be. What would your advice be for them to step back and see that? What do you do with your modalities for your clients?

Lisa: Well, first of all, I don't think entrepreneurialism is for everyone. I think it's a very, very challenging road. If you don't have enormous passion to, what I say, make shift happen, that's my tagline. If you don't really have that strong, strong desire, like a life-or-death desire of I have to do this, this is a gift, it's a super strong calling, you probably won't make it, because you have to make so many sacrifices in your life. It's not easy. I'm a mom. I'm a sister. I'm a daughter. I'm a wife. I have colleague friends. I have best friends from childhood. I have friends from Los Angeles. Again, a mother, mother, mother. It's so much driving, pickups, having their playdates, they're this, they're that. So you have to find a way to balance it all and put it all in harmony where you don't destroy yourself. So it's really mind, body, heart, soul. Some of my clients came to me: oh, but I work 24 hours a day. I'm going, that's your problem.

Lisa: What I found was the secret sauce. When I was struggling, I go, okay, I'm sick of struggling. I'm not happy. I'm just working, working, working. Anytime I enjoy myself, I'm like, oh my God, now I've got this much piled up at home. It's not like, oh, I get to enjoy. It's like if you don't do it now, it's just going to keep accumulating. So I thought, let me go in silence. And I learned the 80/20 rule, where if you work hard for 20 percent, the 80 just falls in place if you have good structure. And going in silence, I start meditating at sunrise and meditating when the sun sets, and just telling the universe, tell me what I'm supposed to do. And just quiet the mind. Some mornings I wake up and I just put on chanting music and put in the earbuds, because it goes straight into your brain. Just getting the rhythm of the morning, calming everything, your whole nervous system. Then it's like, okay, now I can start the day. Because I'll get up early and do that, sometimes go back to bed, and then start it. And exercise each day. And I'm talking, you could do all of this, mind, body, heart, soul, in five minutes, or you could take an hour if you have that luxury. Just read a paragraph of something inspirational. Move your body. Do three stretches just to wake yourself up. Take a walk, even if it's just in your yard and back, 20 feet or a mile, whatever you can do. Feeding your soul, feeding your mind, spreading love. Every morning I write to someone and say, I love you. It's like, oh, it's your turn again, because it's just them.

You could do all of this, mind, body, heart, soul, in five minutes, or you could take an hour if you have that luxury.

Share this quote on X

Lisa: Because really, at the end of the day, what is life about? I think one of your questions that you like asking people is, what is a question that you think I should ask you? That would be something like, what really is the meaning of life? So cliché. But I found after all these years, over 60 countries and being a mom, a spouse, a sibling, a daughter, I think the meaning of life is really to be happy. What brings you joy, what brings you happiness? And what brings you joy and happiness is loving someone and someone loving you. How many people do you love? How many actually love you back? So who are you as a person? And then you get joy and happiness from that. And then when you're happy, you could conquer the world. That's when success comes in. Well, I can't be happy if I'm not rich and famous, or I'm not rich or successful or a CEO. I have to reach my goals. You can't reach your goals and be happy. You might be rich, but you won't be happy. And I've worked with so many of those people. I've worked on a lot of movie sets and with a couple of billionaires in Japan, whatever. I've worked with a lot of people, and success could come to you, but if you're not happy, you're going to blow it at the casinos. You're going to blow it on buying things, a bigger house, a boat, a yacht. And then you're so bombarded with responsibility and taking care of all these things. Then people: give me your money, give me your money. Everyone asking you for money, not realizing you're not the only one. Now you've got 10 people, 15 people saying, well, you got so lucky. Then it's like, who do you give what to, and how? It just becomes messy, and it's lonely at the top.

I think the meaning of life is really to be happy.

Kathi: Yes.

Lisa: So really, it's about finding your people, a couple of people that love you and you love. And then that brings your joy, that gives you your base, and then you could move from there.

Kathi: I totally agree with you on that. It's so funny that you talk about make shift happen. I almost named this podcast Shift Happens, and then I branded it Organized and Energized, the name of my company. But I thought, shift does happen, and shift should happen, actually. If shift isn't happening, then you're asleep.

Lisa: Exactly. Yes, I agree. And you're not living life. You can't live life safe in a little box.

Kathi: I think what you said about having to have the dark nights, having to have the obstacles, we create those. I agree, because that's an expansion mechanism. It makes us expand. And if there's no obstacle, we don't expand, and then life's boring. So you're the queen of expansion, I do believe. I can't believe that you were running around going, take me, take me, abduct me, I want to write a book about this.

Lisa: Kidnap me so I could bond with you, and we could tell your story and I could fix you. We could do a book tour together. From terrorist to humanitarian, you too can have this journey.

Kathi: That's crazy. So that just shows you that mind over soul. If your soul's in charge, you're pretty much safe. And I think you can also control how people react to you and how people treat you. A minister, she's walking in a bad neighborhood, and she goes, well, it's not a bad neighborhood. Those are not bad people that are coming to me. Those are people that I am showing love towards. No one would hurt me. So you follow a similar path, and kudos to you, because it does take some inner knowing and inner wisdom to do that. Okay, so I know you have your book, and you have several other things. Is there anything that you would like to offer the guests here that they can download to get a closer connection with you?

Lisa: Yeah. If they go to my website, soulblazing.com, and they sign up for the newsletter, they'll get a whole 10-page, beautiful, inspirational work that they could have lots of insights from. And I'm doing this three-tier Zoom class. The first eight weeks is know your impostors: really knowing the obstacles that you have in your life, and we work on those. The second eight weeks is know your story. So we'll write your story, then rewrite your story, one that works for you, because again, your thoughts create your reality. You can let go of, when I was six, this happened, so my whole life is ruined. I have clients like that in their 50s and 60s: well, when I was six, my dad said this to me. It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, and there's the story, on and on. It's like a lifetime ago, 10 lifetimes ago. Come on, let's keep evolving. And then the third eight weeks is creating your legacy. Now that you know this and you have your new story, how do you create from that joyful place and really make shift happen and create magic in your life? A lot of it is radical self-acceptance and forgiveness, and we do a lot of those exercises.

Kathi: That sounds fantastic. So, folks, if you go to the website and you download it, then I'm sure you're going to be getting the updates about the Zoom classes that are coming up. I think that'll be fantastic. So everybody jump in. Everybody can be a soulblazer.

Lisa: Yes, we can. Yes, absolutely.

Kathi: Okay. Well, thank you so much for your time. It's been a real pleasure. I love listening to your story. I've actually never heard of a Baghdad house, or being under a Baghdad roof. That was quite interesting, intriguing from the very beginning. But I think because you did have the mixed background, that's what put you on that quest. Imagine if you were just born from two people from the Midwest. It'd be a totally different person. So we're all blessed by the backgrounds that we have, even though we don't think that we are half the time. We are who we are, why we are right here, right now, with our parents, so that we can find our soul purpose this time around. So thank you so much. It's been a pleasure getting to know you, and I really appreciate your time on the show.

Lisa: I appreciate you too. You're doing great work.

Kathi: Well, thank you. Signing off for now, gang. We'll see you next week.